"The courage to be vulnerable is not about winning or losing; it’s about the courage to show up when you can’t predict or control the outcome." – Brené Brown

Imagine waking up one day, looking in the mirror, and realizing that every time you avoided discomfort or chose convenience, you traded away a stronger, more present version of yourself. As parents, this feeling can creep in when we’re sleep-deprived, overwhelmed, and just trying to make it through the day. But showing up—truly showing up—is the first step toward transforming your child’s sleep and also your connection with them.

If you’re here, I know you’ve likely felt the frustration and exhaustion that comes with sleep struggles. I’ve been there too. That’s why the first Sleep Principle, Show Up, is so close to my heart. It’s not just about being physically present—it’s about bringing your best energy, attitude, and authentic self to your parenting. Not the parent you think you “should” be, but the parent your child truly needs: the real you.

And sometimes, showing up means pausing, reflecting, and asking yourself a better question: Am I breathing LOVE, or am I breathing fear in this moment? Am I learning or judging?

Why Showing Up Matters in Sleep Coaching

When I work with families, I often see parents looking for a quick solution—"Just give me the sleep plan, and I’ll follow it!" But here’s the truth: there’s no one-size-fits-all sleep solution because our children aren’t robots. They’re beautifully complex little humans with their own personalities, needs, and rhythms. And as parents, we set the tone for how they experience life which includes sleep.

The Show Up principle is about more than bedtime routines or nap schedules. It’s about your presence—mentally, emotionally, and physically. When you show up with intention, you create a safe, calming environment where your child feels secure enough to rest.

That’s why I created the Breathe LOVE Guide. It’s a free tool and training designed to help you dive deeper into this foundational principle. It's human nature to want to  skip over this critical first step—but I believe it’s the key to good nights of sleep, peaceful days, and being prepared for sleep regressions. Click here to access the guide and free training now.

The Breathe LOVE Mantra: A Framework for Trust

To help parents shift their mindset and show up in a way that builds trust, I teach the Breathe LOVE mantra. It’s a powerful framework designed to help you pause, reframe your thinking, and build trust in your relationships—both with your child and yourself.  It really works for all relationships.  

Here’s how it works:

1. Breathe: Pause. Take a deep breath. This step resets your nervous system and helps you approach the moment with clarity instead of reacting impulsively.
2. LOVE:
• Listen: Tune in to what your child is communicating—verbally or through their cues.
• Observe: Take a moment to notice your child’s and your behavior, body language, and needs without judgment.  
• Validate: Acknowledge emotions and experiences for you and your child.   Let them know you see them and that their feelings are valid.   
• Empower: Respond in a way that supports them and helps them feel confident and secure.

This process isn’t just for your child—it’s for you, too. When you Breathe LOVE, you’re actively reframing your perspective. Instead of focusing on what’s going wrong, you’re building a foundation of trust, connection, and calm. That energy sets the tone for everything, including your child’s sleep.

Join a Sleep Community That Supports Your Growth

If you’ve ever wished you had a village to lean on during your parenting journey, I’d like to invite you to join my Sleep Coaching Success Group. This group offers weekly live coaching where we work together to get your child’s sleep on track while also helping you grow into the calm, confident, and rested parent you want to be.

You don’t have to do this alone. When you join the group, you’ll gain access to a supportive community of parents who understand your struggles and are here to cheer you on every step of the way. Learn more about joining here.

How I Learned that Showing Up Matters

I’ll be honest—I didn’t always Breathe LOVE. In my early days as a parent, I was stuck in a cycle of stress, intrusive thoughts,  and exhaustion. I’d snap at my husband,  feel guilty, and overthink every little thing. My child’s cries felt overwhelming, and I constantly doubted whether I was doing enough.

Then, one day, I realized something: I wasn’t just reacting to my child’s behavior; I was reacting to my own unmet needs. I wasn’t showing up for myself, and as a result, I couldn’t fully show up for my boys and the children in my care.   That’s when I started practicing Breathe LOVE. It was hard at first—honestly, there were times I wanted to throw the mantra out the window! But over time, it became a habit that not only transformed my parenting but also helped me find more peace and rest in my day-to-day life.

Dive Deeper into the Sleep Principles

This blog is just the beginning of what I want to share with you. If you’re curious about how the Breathe LOVE framework fits into the larger picture of creating healthy sleep habits, check out my podcast episode where I do a deep dive into all the Sleep Principles. It’s packed with insights, stories, and practical tips you can start using right away. Click here to listen now.

Let’s Take Action

Here’s how you can start implementing the Show Up principle in your parenting this week:

1. Download the Breathe LOVE Guide:
   Start your journey by grabbing this free tool and training that will help you reframe your thinking and take that first step toward better sleep. Get it here.
2. Practice Breathe LOVE Daily:
   When your child is fussy or resisting sleep, pause and take three deep breaths. Then, go through the LOVE process: Listen, Observe, Validate, Empower.
3. Join the Sleep Coaching Success Group:
   Surround yourself with a community of like-minded parents and get weekly live coaching that helps you stay consistent and calm while making real progress with your child’s sleep. Learn more here.

The Courage to Show Up

Parenting is a journey full of unpredictable twists and turns, and sometimes it feels like there’s no end to the sleep struggles. But here’s what I want you to remember: the act of showing up is powerful. It’s not about having all the answers or doing everything perfectly—it’s about being there, day in and day out, and giving your child the love and security they need to thrive.

This week, I invite you to practice Breathe LOVE and see how it shifts your mindset. And when you do, let me know how it works for you! I love hearing from the amazing parents in this community.

Because here’s the truth: every time you show up for yourself, you’re also showing up for your child. And that’s where the magic of parenting—and better sleep—truly begins.